So 6 days

I returned to work on Monday to catch-up on the previous weeks work and stuff I didn’t do on vacation. I only got 1 call from work while on vacation so that was nice.  There are a few things that went on including meeting a chick from the interwebs that was a rather interesting experience.

But for some reason in the last 6 days something has happened. I don’t know how to explain it other than its not good. My mood is all over the place and I feel as if I’m dead. I guess rather than saying all over the place as in I really don’t have a mood I normaly have some sort of a mood be happy or disconnected. I don’t know whats up and I’ve been racking my brain to figure it out. I would talk thru it with friends if I knew what to talk about. I’m a blank slate only surviving but not thriving like I was just 20 days ago. I don’t know if my meds are suddenly out of wack. I had several good days while on vacation but a few bad days. I don’t like where this mood is taking me and I don’t know how to stop it. I’ve decided if it doesn’t clear up by the weeks end I’m going to make an appt. with my doc and see what can be done. To say I’m scared and worried is a point but I’m more worried of me losing who I’ve fought to be over the last year and half. *shrug* I wish I could crank out an entire rant about how vacation sucked and I hate life but thats not it nor is it applicable to this mood. I should be talking about my run-in with a neighbor that accused me of stealing his fucking lawnmower and me having to call the cops or again the girl I met that is interesting but I just can’t. The thoughts are there but the action of putting them to the keyboard is not. I guess I did have a “rant” but thats all I know to do today.