Today

Today so far in 2013 has been the worst emotional day I’ve had in years for absolutely no reason. It’s not really a mood swing but more of a mental breakdown. I have choices I have to make, things to do I don’t want to, things I can’t control coming straight at me and no matter how big of a shield or wall it won’t stop them. I’m not the impenetrable solid soul today. Something with the turning of fall I’ll blame. Today I feel like an ant and everyone else it the Sears tower. Trying not to get squished. I can’t even put it into words how today I feel. I can’t say suicidal because I don’t wish to die but I do wish I could wrap myself up in a blanket on a beach and watch a sunset kinda calm. Being single sucks and having nobody to tap into makes it worse. All I can do is take a Tylenol PM and hope when I wake-up life will once again have a meaning.